In high school it's said to be the hardest year. In college...well, I don't know what the hardest year is said to be. All I know is that this year has been haaard.
My year started off with two of my closest friends not here. One moved to Kentucky, one moved to Wichita. So that sucked. I had my very first apartment! Which was exciting and new, and, frankly, a little scary. I was about to start my first semester at K-State. I had been waiting for that to happen for quite a while. Everything (except my two friends not being in the same town as me) made it look like it would be a great year. My classes were great, my friends were great, my apartment was great, my housemates were great.
Then school started.
Like clock work stuff with my FAFSA got messed up. K-State tried charging me an extra ten grand for some reason. Nothin' like a little bill for $10,000! It took a while to get that straightened up. What it came down to is...I still had a big bill to pay (not 10 grand, thankfully), no job, and no car.
So I needed a job. Easy peasy, right?
Wrong.
I turned in application after application after application. Nada. I had (have) no car, so I was (am) limited to a certain area. Week after week went by. Then I realize: I am going to die.
Just kidding. I didn't know how to handle anything. Then it clicked: Trust God. Duh. He owns everything. He'll provide. Either that or I'll die. Well, I had nothing else to do but to trust Him.
Allowing the Holy Spirit to work through other people to bless me is one of the hardest things I learned this semester. With no job, no car, and no money I had no choice. I had school, an apartment, and had to eat somehow. The only way to survive is to let others help me. It was awful. My family, Will and Dev, Kirsten, and Shannon all helped me out. It was embarrassing and hard for me to accept.
But God takes care of His children. How could I have ever doubted that He would provide for me? I learned that I am a little prideful. I learned that in order for God to work in me, I had to allow other people to help me financially. I was stuck in a place that I had to do everything myself, and I could do everything myself. Sure, I knew God would provide. However, I wouldn't let Him. Opening myself and my plans and, ultimately, my heart to God with my finances has been the hardest, but best challenge, for me this year.
Now junior year is half way over (praise God). I have a job, I have some money, I have no car and am (usually) fine with it. I know that God has some pretty great things for me in the near future. I trust Him with my finances. But I know there will be something else this semester that I have to learn. It'll probably suck a little bit.
But it's all worth it.
